Three Kisses

"Three Kisses" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

True Friends love you when they see you hurting. They kiss you when you have a tear in your eye. They keep you warm with a blanket. They say "I love you" over and over until you GET it. They stand as the light while your vision is blocked by your own shadow.

If God gave us everything, then everything we need is here. It is our opportunity and choice to reach out and use what was given. We lack nothing. It is our purpose, to hand to others what we now know.

True Friends. Simple love. No strings.

Thank you Friends.

--dar freeland

faceupstudio.com

Empty Nest

"Meta" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

RE-cognition.

Identify my beliefs about a thing, identify its function and value in my life. What is driving my feelings and behavior? Check.

Ac-KNOW-ledge.

Admit that some negativity or story is there, and is running me. Do I feel out of control? I must be close to the truth. Check.

ACCEPTance.

Admit that it has been here, it served its purpose. Allow the truth to "be". There is no proving, no conflict. Just "now". Check.

RELEASE.

Stop grasping, stop holding onto illusions, throw old beliefs into the air and watch them float away. Surrender all to healing, with wisdom, open heart and grace. Check.

There is nothing to fear about the "empty nest" syndrome devoid of all my dramas and stories that lived in my head. The silence is bliss. It only makes more room for love, light, new synapses, inspiration, creativity, quantum healing, fun and fierce ideas for making more joy. How bad is that really?

--dar freeland

faceupstudio.com

About the Art: Original acrylic on raised board by Dar Freeland. 4 piece original for sale at faceupstudio.com in the "four dot" show section of the art directory or single prints available-contact faceupstudio@aol.com.

If you "jack" my art, please give me credit at www.faceupstudio.com. Not stealing is better though.

The "WE"

"Proving Ground" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

Can one who is suffering, hear and feel compassion? Can one who is hurting, feel anything unless they receive exactly the help they are asking for?

Today, the mind is bruised with the pain of angry egos and needs unheard.

Today, the heart is blinded by scolding silence and complete abandonment.

Today, the soul gives back to the Father, the sweetest gift ever received.

No time-outs left.

Who wins?

A gentle wind is weeping.

The hawks are silent in the trees above the house.

I think they know too.

On Father's Day. How perfect.

--dar freeland

faceupstudio.com

The Hamster Wheel

"The Wheel" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

Guilt, shame, blame, repeat. Don't skip any steps.

What happens when the human hamster wheel we are running on while at our weakest level of consciousness becomes exposed? Our hidden self screams out with anger. Why would we choose something that provides volatility, rage and finally the systematic disintegration of all we've worked to build that is peaceful?...because that is what we do...

Why would we choose to be on this wheel to begin with? Most of the time, we don't know we are on it. But little untruths that emerge are our first clue. We feel we must hide something or be judged for it. Guilt is a huge waste of energy and resources within. But we are taught to feel it to our core, and the challenge to love self beyond another's opinion runs deep. When exposed, many feel anger about not having the strength or resources to remain hidden - so we strike out...and usually the what or who we love is standing too close to our volcano.

We feel guilt about something, then we feel shame, then we blame. Once the arrow of blame has been cast, we feel guilt about it. Then shame. Then we blame some more. We run so fast on the wheel that our egos become extraordinary athletes at it, or fall to the side in exhaustion. Then we feel some more guilt at what we are not. Some jump back on the wheel and push it into rotation again. Some jump OFF. Those are the lucky ones.

When we are always in the truth about ourselves, what we think, feel and do - even if it is unpleasant - we are finally FREE. We are human and imperfect...yet we never need to feel that we have to hide in order to survive or not be beaten down more - a potentially systemic condition. We CAN be imperfect because our imperfection is as impermanent as we are. It is a small moment in time. We know we can make adjustments and do it again until whatever it is - however we want to live and be, is in resonance with who we really know we are. We can say "I don't know" and be at peace with that until we find the solution.

We are already perfect - even and especially with those things we judge as imperfect. Not believing this (from years of conditioning) or trying to prove that we are someone different is what makes us jump on the wheel in the first place. The wheel goes nowhere. Only and always back to itself, until we are exhausted and fall, then we do it some more.

Jump.

--dar freeland

faceupstudio.com

The Path of the One Heart

"Conversations" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

Dramas, addictions, illusions, desires, stories - could perhaps be considered the product of a mind unfocused and without discipline.

A person does not need to have things be hard or dramatic - the goal is more to engage in a soft ease of living peacefully with excitement and pleasure. The cherry on top is being able to give to others with absolute abandon.

First, to clear the road, the baggage needs to be removed.

I found that giving up relationship with destructive emotions (other’s projections of shame and blame that I myself have bought into) … this toxicity could finally be released by the four step process I refer to as “Meta”:

1. Recognize (Identify what is the problem - what is it that does not feel like it fits or resonates with me?)

2. Acknowledge (See it is here and allow it to be exposed to self and others)

3. Accept (Embrace the truths discovered - understand its source and consequence-without trying to push it away)

4. Release (I stop grasping for it, buying into the addiction of it, feeling the illusion of its allure, let go)

Once we've taken the issue, and applied the above; the movie shown on the screen of relationship (another person’s actions and reactions) no longer needs to be present in life - and therefore does vanish. Once we see it, the projection has served its purpose and is no longer necessary.

One action that cannot be escaped - is to be accountable for my actions, take personal responsibility. Say I am sorry where it is appropriate. Make amends. This is particularly healing, and speeds the process. It is non-negotiable, because any attempt at healing that involves only blame, will repeat as an unrelenting reminder that the work is not complete and/or in full integrity.

We need to distinguish illusion, self-talk, rationalization, ego - all from what is truly living inside of self. Once we see it for real, we can let it go and open the heart fully. This new space now becomes a place to receive what we say we truly want, instead of a place to store the baggage.

How I choose to fill this void now, is up to me.

In this new moment, if one chooses, any relationship can stay intact. With note of the adjustments needed for healthy self care, and the pain having been addressed - the issues can now transform into empty space, providing the opportunity to fill that space with something more useful, such as love or peace.

--dar freeland

faceupstudio.com

The Bleating Egos

"One Two Punch" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

Anger and pain only last a moment, just drama that blurts forth in its self indulgent way. Comes then goes...and we can be the observer, or the catcher. It only stays if we grasp at it then hold on tight. When we make a fist, some stuff may get caught in there, then it is ours forever.

Unless we let go.

Blame and shame at our own emotions...the intolerance demonstrated against our own selves for being human, for losing our way, for being less than perfect - like throwing gas on a fire. True for ALL parties. It never is about anyone "out there" - other people are the screens onto which we project our movie. Can anyone other than anger's author even distinguish between "attack" and "accuracy" - and doesn't the receiver have his own movie playing simultaneously - governed by his own script? Are we so small that a bleating ego can crush a true and infinite love?

So what, now what?

"I'm sorry" is only the starting gun to the race - a sprint to the solution. If we can't hear the gun, we don't even know the race has begun. Perhaps we'd rather lose ourselves in the anesthesia of all that feels nothing, or what we think will feel "good" and will ultimately have us feel more shame...leaving us only to think, think, think.

Stuck on our hamster wheel of thought, our hearts wither and cry themselves to sleep.

I knew someone once. When my life was hurting, he asked permission, then tenderly kissed my eye. Ever since then, I've seen life differently. What magic his kiss.

I wish I had his power, I could just as tenderly kiss HIS eye - so he could see things differently.

--dar freeland

faceupstudio.com

"What The World Needs Now..."

"Expedition Chess" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

This morning I've considered many things regarding how we have been interacting with one another. I am speaking of humanity - the World community. America is polarized politically, families are arguing about money and behaviors, people are judging others relentlessly. This is also true among the people of the World collectively. Who is happy?

The Arts, which used to be a sanctuary or respite from so called "literal life"....it is becoming trampled with greed and invalidation - stolen for profit by those who do not create it, to advance their own purposes and shunned by those who would judge it as anything other than the mirror that it is. Art is a beautiful statement of our inside life, the one we don't allow anyone else to see. It is that recognition on whatever medium that gives art its immense value. We see ourselves in it.

One simple statement on that - Art is your MIRROR, world. It is a simple regurgitation of what its creator sees around him.

Art allows us to look in the mirror, and decide again. It allows us to think about life. It allows us to consider, recognize and make adjustments in our paths - because we are the CREATORS of our own lives. If we don't look at our lives, act on what we see, take part in our own evolution, we are just taking up space. Is that the life we want to live? I do not.

To those who would think that yelling is key - all yelling creates, is more yelling and a closing off of people to one another. Person to person, family to family, country to country and beyond. It does NOT provide any sort of SOLUTION. To become informed and educated is important, but not a solution unto itself. It allows one to yell with more articulation, yet the solution remains up to US to implement.

To those who would judge a musical artist like Sting (a prolific humanitarian) or any other artist/musician/creative who chooses to PRACTICE and DEMONSTRATE PEACE instead of going with the "norm" and engaging in an endless stream of bickering, political judgement and isolation - I say think again.

And guess what else...to judge a creative for "taking money" because of the payor's actions in life is ludicrous. If ANY business person assessed/judged and sentenced the actions of the buyer before selling to him - capitalism would cease to exist. A person has to sleep only with himself at night, and taking a stand is an individual right and responsibility - not up for discussion with world opinion. In other words, a personal choice and nobody's business.

All creatives are ENTITLED to make an income from their art. It is called WORK. He is NOT here solely for the world's entertainment. That went out with the Fool who performed for Kings.

Compassion and tolerance is the only key that will set us free from the polarization that is literally tearing the world apart. Assuming that the current trend of World "Scolding" and political name-calling rants on TV or any other place, is going to produce a USEFUL or TRANSFORMATIVE result...I say to all think again. Look in the mirror. What we see is our own ugliness looking back at us and we don't like it. Wake up everyone - we have the power to see things differently. No one else can see things from inside of our own heads...that is up to us.

Why are there so many prominent people leaving the planet? Why are planes falling out of the sky and wiping the entire "chessboard" clean? Why are there so many earthquakes right now? Powerful, jolting, destructive quakes? Is the earth asking, demanding that we wake up from our illusions? Is the movement of the earth its (metaphorical) art - showing us our own inner earthquakes, the devastation to our minds and souls? Is the earth demonstrating that in the face of our refusal to do so on our own, it will INSIST we unite - if not through our own evolution and wisdom, then through its powerful mandate? Let's face it - no matter the worst offenses of man...the earth herself will win.

Maybe if people used the Arts, used their power of discernment and thought...maybe if people stopped yelling and judging, pointing fingers, blaming and name calling - just maybe we could move beyond all of the apparent inconsolable unhappiness around us that we are all contributing to and in so doing - helping to create more of...a World Tantrum.

Maybe we could open a door - demonstrate and welcome some love, tolerance and peace into our own homes - one thought, one sentence, one person, one family member, one topic, one community, country and one world at a time. Jump with me off the anger wagon, choose again. There is absolutely nothing useful about acting or feeling this way. It is a useless waste of energy, effort, resources, choice and our own lives.

When was the last time we felt real, sincere, deeply rooted, immovable JOY? How about today?

--dar freeland

faceupstudio.com

Sunshine or Salt?

"Love Never Lost" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

When we are in the presence of someone hurting, do we see outside ourselves to their feelings, or do we interrupt our natural response of compassion? If a child were hurting, would we just shake our head and pass by, yelling "hey! suck it up!" or would we stop and with empathy, love the little one until it feels safe and out of pain? What do we do with the children of the mind? In an adult body, or a shorter young body - makes no matter the size. It is a child's pain in an older frame.

So, when faced with a wound - of our loved one, or our own - are we sunshine that heals, or salt that stings?

--dar freeland

faceupstudio.com

Human Detours

"Fear Days" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

Nothing feels more frustrating than to watch a loved one struggle needlessly with their own thoughts. A learning process perhaps - but habitual arguing, defeatist attitudes, self sabotage, literally standing on the freeway of one's own mind....how do we love them off the highway of self destruction? How do we ask; "please, don't allow yourself to be your own orange cone today..."

--dar freeland

faceupstudio.com

Stacks

"Early Messages" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

Since we are all contemplating our individual situations of "Love" - it felt useful to share something I learned recently. We've all heard "this too shall pass" - yet I've witnessed for years that imprints collected over a life of emotional wounding - don't "pass." They embed in our emotional memories and arise to ask for healing recognition and release on a regular basis. But do we notice them and respond? Do we honor the past once and for all with our validation or gloss over the feelings, pushing them farther down to emerge again as an "issue?"

Once we acknowledge the source of our pain or aggravation, then the energy of the wound holds no further purpose and will release. This is a concept I've attempted to convey for many years, in teaching how to honor one's feelings. We are not "crazy" or over reacting when we feel passionate about a thing...we are usually reacting to a "stack" of things that have the same energetic fingerprint - a sort of "straw that broke the camels' back." It isn't the one thing we are reacting to, it is the that one thing on top of a stack of history bearing the same imprint.

When something stacks up - our reactions aren't at that ONE thing, it backed by (the unconscious collected evidence) the STACK of things. So taking personal responsibility - and to give ourselves our own power back, we can look at the reaction of a thing and know we are not "crazy" - we can have compassion for self and others for carrying a stack of things, and know the reaction is leading us to our ultimate healing. Once we experience and honor the release of the past...the future can hold and/or express as nothing more than a benign response, or even better, a neutral event.

-- dar freeland

faceupstudio.com

Because WHAT Is Number One?

"The Machine" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

I'm noticing so many people in anguish about money...creating dramas, wrapped in blames, tied up with bows of sarcasms and hurled angrily at their loved ones. Why?

Why does "paper" and all the significance we attach to it cause this kind of challenge - especially between people who truly LOVE each other? Does money and our perceived problems with, without, or about it - cause love to collapse under the weight of it?

If a loved one had cancer, would we say "f" you? Yet when a loved one has a money problem, we DO say "f" you. The stress of both/either has the potential to tear even the best relationships apart.

So what is the difference, other than money is so much more important in the head than our health? What sense does THAT make?

When we come together in cancer - somehow our love calls forth our passionate strength and we grasp hands, stand beside each other with respect and jump. TOGETHER.

When money problem raises its head and roars, we juggle the reasons and realities, point fingers and blame, then say "f" you. The price we put on how much, or little, or "than others"....on and on...the ego demands that we demolish the cause of the pain, and it since it MUST be YOU - the finger points and LOVE jumps off the cliff.

Why?

LOVE is the one, unshakeable solution, because the only one charge of "losing" it, is us.

--dar freeland

faceupstudio.com

Supply and Demand

"Tuna or Ham" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

What happens if a gas tank starts to get low and one knows it will eventually run out of whatever it uses for fuel and then it will not be able to move forward anymore? (fuel = "supply" = attention, sex, chosen anesthesia, approval, praise, winning, applause).

Does it fear? (Get angry at everything around it, because it doesn't want the world to see its shame, it's fragility, its imperfection, its vulnerability).

Does the tank do whatever it believes is necessary to fill itself up until it feels full again? (seeks more illusions, the "supply" to fill it up).

Then does it feel good for a time until it uses up the fuel, (supply = illusions, love stories, sex, distractions) then feel fear, (hopelessness at no obvious solution to fill its emptiness) then does it hate itself for being out of integrity, (wag a finger of hate and blame the world outside itself for not filling its expectations and try to cover its own self loathing and belief it is powerless).

Then does it go out and fill itself up some more? (more attention, sex, chosen anesthesia, approval, praise, winning, applause, ego by association)

Is this endless circle the answer....or the running of the engine (endless consumption of distraction, sex, anesthesia, running) until it drops from final exhaustion? Dis-ease, walking dead, death itself...samsara.

What may be possible, if the tank KNEW it would always be full from the inside out? (Faith in healing backed by action and commitment to fix what is "broken")

What would it be like, if it experienced others around it as a constant SUPPLY, (endless, loving, accepting, safe?) What if THAT kind of SUPPLY, the kind it truly deserves and has at its doorstep, does exist - and has been thrown away, over and over?

Would the tank even notice, or is it filled with fear of being empty? (exposed, judged as without value, and discarded). Love and fear cannot occupy the same space.

Isn't this where one would start looking for the inner station, and stop watching the fuel light with trepidation?

The safest place in the world, is sometimes right before our eyes. Yet we don't look up from ourselves long enough, explore it deep enough, or believe it possible enough - to allow it to be. Or maybe "empty" feels just way too comfortable to let go of.

No one but two people in Australia know what I mean, but if they ever read this, they will.

--dar freeland

faceupstudio.com

The Secret of a Confabulation

"Two Sides of Me" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

I discovered myself fortunate enough for someone to share a secret with me today. The friend looks deeply into the mirror each day and knows self so well, yet after a long struggle uphill, they confessed to having seen not only a funny new "love" which isn't really so....but also a hostile and confusing place called "the world out there."

The friend told me "If I go one place, I find that the people closest to me act the most intimate with me, but they do not respect me. If I go to the other place, I find that the people closest to me are kind and filled with respect for our relationship, yet they lack depth and closeness and will not be intimate." We scratched our heads. The friend continued - "is it that the people in the first place who act intimate, see me as a person they cannot respect? (and that was explored to the depths)...or is it that the people in the other place who respect me, simply don't know me?" (that too was examined)

Blank stare and some silence.

"Is it that the ones who do not respect me are blinded by a narcissistic obsession with self, and can see me only as a mirror of their own wounds - don't even really take the time to figure who I am?...and the friends who would say we are friends in the other place, could it be that they don't feel safe or worthy to open their hearts to be intimate with anyone?"

We sat in the sun for a time and breathed. Then we exhaled and did it again. We shook our heads. And we made it through one more day.

--dar freeland

faceupstudio.com

In The Stillness, What Do You Hear?

"Lit" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

What would I say, if the world cared to listen?

I would say, "listen."

Nothing else in this life will matter nearly as much, to us all.

--dar freeland

faceupstudio.com

A Note To Us

...a rare re-post from someone's FB page I stumbled upon. I believe it is authored by the name below it.

-- dar freeland

***********

It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing?

It doesn't interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for LOVE, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive?

It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon. I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow, if you have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shriveled and closed from fear of further pain?

I want to know if you can sit with pain - mine or your own - without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it?

I want to know if you can be with joy - mine or your own; if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, be realistic, or to remember the limitations of being human?

It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself; if you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul?

I want to know if you can be faithful and therefore be trustworthy?

I want to know if you can see beauty even when it is not pretty everyday?

It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up after a night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done for the children?

It doesn't interest me who you know or how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back?

It doesn't interest me where or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you from the inside, when all else falls away?

I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments?

--Oriah, Mountain Dreamer