In The Spirit Of Gratitude

"Family Album" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 dar freeland | all rights reserved

How does one sift out all of the extraneous dramas of the holidays and just get down to what is important - that love is bigger than all the smallness that we could muster up for a psychologically dramatic impact? Are we so habitually bored as a species that we can’t make it through one day without letting our whole life history mess up 24 hours together? Why do we so often find ourselves operating with our loved ones before the meal, eating and/or spitting out all of our emotional leftovers?

How do we laser in our focus on what really matters, which is to honor and respect another person - even relatives? Oooooooo. Yes, we are different and that is what makes life juicy, exciting and an ever-evolving challenge. Our differences are our gifts and lessons - our Life School, so why do we choose to misbehave or ditch school entirely? We all know THAT isn’t going to work. Being truant from our relationships only puts distance between our bodies and our stuff - it doesn’t HEAL anything. The old saying still goes, wherever you go, there you are. Our history, feelings, and life stories are locked in our inner library so no matter what the location - they will emerge, with others posing as the mirrors of our family or **gasp** our family itself.

We may not love all the behavior around us - but aren’t we grown up enough now to allow “behavioral” moments to be just moments? Even a lifetime collection of words and deeds does not make a person fixed. The opportunity to become new each moment exists as a choice within us all, so no one can be assigned as “this is who you are….” That determination is for a person and their maker to decide, a private matter that is none of our business. Heal thyself. Is it possible that we focus so much on guarding our hearts, and consequently forget to open them?

Is anyone up for charging ahead and being fearless about love?

So what kind of holiday would WE create, if we truly got it and believed that we were the one creating it? At the least, how will we participate and contribute to a meaningful, thankful, joyful, juicy, playful and empowering time together?

Even in the face of no evidence, LOVE ANYWAY.

--dar freeland

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The Inner Mandala

"Mons Philosophorum" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 dar freeland | all rights reserved

A measure of one’s strength, is to know one can stand in the face of no evidence - and remain the observer despite a crazy environment. He can maintain calm in a sea of chaos - stay intact, when everything nearby is imploding.

One can smile at the wonder of it all.

When one refuses to collapse into those around him, he demonstrates an inner mandala, a self-righting machine. He notices and experiences a network of self unity, certainty and commitment. This inner-empowerment cradles a knowing heart through the deepest challenges and the darkest of nights the soul will face.

And one will smile at the wonder of it.

A healthy person will deconstruct at his own pace - the things about himself that no longer serve him. Remaining at peace, and with grace - through a disciplined mind while letting go, is the greatest spiritual muscle one will ever test.

And the Universe will smile at the wonder of it.

--dar freeland

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The Bottom Line

image & text © 2000 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

www.faceupstudio.com/blahg

When distilled down to it's most finite, all anyone wants, is to know they are loved.

Free. Easy.

Simple.

--dar freeland

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Unmasked

"Mirror Mirror" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

How much of our perceptions of the world, our inner thinking, beliefs and self-proclaimed truisms are evident - available for us to see - outside of ourselves? How many of us pay attention to the synchronicities and metaphors presented to us in the gallery of life?

If the Universe had a canvas, (which it does) like an artist (which it is) - would it draw each of us a personal painting of what it sees? (it does every minute).

Would we buy it?

What if we removed ourselves from our cyclical thinking, our patterned behavior, and our “that’s just the way it is” way of seeing things? What possibilities may be served up for us to learn? Can we give up our need to be in charge for long enough to learn anything? Are we all so wounded from the control of our historical baggage - that we will spend the remainder of our lives in the illusion that we can “avoid being controlled” - and therefore remain in a state of habitual calculation?

Do we truly believe that calculating anything, gives us any sort of real power?

We are “controlled” by nothing other than our own willingness to comply - our own giving up of our personal freedoms, diminishing our own muscle we call choice. Are we so convinced that because the world tries to tell us what to do (from its position of perceived superiority) and how it is (from it’s limited self-serving perspective) - that something “out there” is so much clearer about our own truth and inner strength than are we are? How much absolute and genuine control over our own destiny could we realize we have, simply by engaging fully with our own power - through the actions of becoming habitually conscious, discerning, open to exploration and utilizing the infinite resources available to us in a field of unlimited possibilities?

Who is really driving our destiny?

True power comes from surrender…and no, that doesn’t mean “giving up” - it means “letting go”. It means learning how to flow in the waters of life, sometimes the within rapids and if we are blessed and choose to create it as such - bobbing along the adventure in the joyous “brand new every moment” discovery of what is next…the inner tube on the lazy river.

Sometimes we get to lay in the stillness of no movement at all, and look up at the sky, a perfect opportunity for gratitude. Sometimes it rains, and we protect ourselves. Sometimes the sun drizzles its golden rays upon us and tickles our spine until we laugh out loud. This life becomes an adventure within which to invent, explore, create, savor and share.

If we didn’t control life, could we still love it?

Would we really choose to live our entire lives in the literal, mundane, “this is how life demonstrates itself therefore, that’s how I will roll” sort of thinking? How boring would life become if we were convinced that our “my way or the highway” decision about how it will turn out was the exact way it is and will be? If we were aware of it, how much precious life energy would we devote to an endless existence of reruns, the same commercial over and over, one step after the next predictable step. What if we are in charge of this too? Is this what we would choose, if we knew we had a choice?

The soul cringes.

On the other hand, a life lived fearless, without judgment or shoulds - discovered, explored and allowed to unfold…the gift that it beholds could be greater than anything we may have calculated for ourselves. What makes us believe we are so much smarter than the gifts the Universe would compose for us? What if we lived our own personal myth - exactly as it unfolds - if we embraced the metaphors and saw our own truths beneath? How powerful a tool would a metaphor be if we unmasked it?

What would we see…if we were fearless enough to look?

So do we choose the opportunity to decipher the metaphors presented to us at each moment, to look into the mirror at our own personal work on this canvas called life? It is our opportunity to choose between living with our historical self (hauling around our baggage) or live each moment anew.

Can we take our (metaphoric) hints and giggle in the mirror while we create our own personal works of art called “self” - our lives from the pallet of infinite possibility? Do we want to live in baggage claim at the airport, or do we choose to live in the gallery of life?

--dar freeland

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Overload

"Blahg_Somebody Needs to Play" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 2000 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

I need a recess. I'm pretty sure that is all I need to write on the subject.

NEXT.

--dar freeland

faceupstudio.com

Stains

"Brew Ha Ha" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 dar freeland | all rights reserved

Relating can be such a challenge this moment in time. Discussions seem fiery and combative, our moods are curt and our stability in the storms around us seem rickety at best. It all feels like a good balancing act is required to keep things mindful and at peace.

How much do we absorb the negativity around us? The first response I hear most often - is that "I don't listen to that stuff or let it affect me...". I believe this to be a thought, versus an actual experience that is conscious. No one really wants to see the level of unhappy that is surrounding humanity right now - yet to deny it exists, makes us part of the problem instead of the source of the solution. "Down" thinking is pervasive at every turn right now - and we need to start looking up, fast. It doesn't mean that to acknowledge our reactions - we are somehow giving up our power or admitting defeat; we are not even taking responsibility - only saying, "ya know, I did feel a little lower after that exchange...maybe I should change things up a bit". If we admit that a thing is negative, even if it is someone or something we love, we aren't betraying it - we are finding a solution to the pain of it, and this is the first necessary step. We absorb, and we don't even know it. For your "evidence", watch a child - they absorb EVERYTHING. The only change that happens with age, is we become capable of spinning our perceptions and words into denial and reasons. We are still absorbing.

For example...the white lace doily from my departed Grandmother's kitchen - it didn't ASK or INTEND to absorb the spilled coffee that made its way into the fabric, and is there now FOR LIFE. It didn't ask or consciously choose, but because of its position and proximity to the spilled coffee, it did what it does without thought or intention, it absorbed the spilled coffee. It is in fact the doily's nature to do so, since it absorbs as a general rule.

We are no different. We absorb what is in our proximity, whether or not we think we do. Our ego will tell us, "hey, got a handle on that" - but it simply does not. Our ego's job is to protect us - and it will tell us everything is under control so we feel secure, but it cannot stop a doily from doily-ing. We are absorption machines, and other people's opinions, silent or spoken judgments and criticisms, praises, put-downs, and general doomsday rhetoric - all makes it into the weave of our psyche and has an impact and eventual consequence. If we are mindful, and watch the results (carrying on a yelling tone with others ie.) - link them properly with their sources, then we have the understanding and power to consciously choose what we want or don't want to absorb.

The world is a toxic place right now, and we need to make clear that our focus, is on removing our precious selves from that toxicity - before we are in fact stained for good.

We can still love coffee, without spilling it down our shirt.

--dar freeland

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Three Kisses

"Three Kisses" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

True Friends love you when they see you hurting. They kiss you when you have a tear in your eye. They keep you warm with a blanket. They say "I love you" over and over until you GET it. They stand as the light while your vision is blocked by your own shadow.

If God gave us everything, then everything we need is here. It is our opportunity and choice to reach out and use what was given. We lack nothing. It is our purpose, to hand to others what we now know.

True Friends. Simple love. No strings.

Thank you Friends.

--dar freeland

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Empty Nest

"Meta" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

RE-cognition.

Identify my beliefs about a thing, identify its function and value in my life. What is driving my feelings and behavior? Check.

Ac-KNOW-ledge.

Admit that some negativity or story is there, and is running me. Do I feel out of control? I must be close to the truth. Check.

ACCEPTance.

Admit that it has been here, it served its purpose. Allow the truth to "be". There is no proving, no conflict. Just "now". Check.

RELEASE.

Stop grasping, stop holding onto illusions, throw old beliefs into the air and watch them float away. Surrender all to healing, with wisdom, open heart and grace. Check.

There is nothing to fear about the "empty nest" syndrome devoid of all my dramas and stories that lived in my head. The silence is bliss. It only makes more room for love, light, new synapses, inspiration, creativity, quantum healing, fun and fierce ideas for making more joy. How bad is that really?

--dar freeland

faceupstudio.com

About the Art: Original acrylic on raised board by Dar Freeland. 4 piece original for sale at faceupstudio.com in the "four dot" show section of the art directory or single prints available-contact faceupstudio@aol.com.

If you "jack" my art, please give me credit at www.faceupstudio.com. Not stealing is better though.

The "WE"

"Proving Ground" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

Can one who is suffering, hear and feel compassion? Can one who is hurting, feel anything unless they receive exactly the help they are asking for?

Today, the mind is bruised with the pain of angry egos and needs unheard.

Today, the heart is blinded by scolding silence and complete abandonment.

Today, the soul gives back to the Father, the sweetest gift ever received.

No time-outs left.

Who wins?

A gentle wind is weeping.

The hawks are silent in the trees above the house.

I think they know too.

On Father's Day. How perfect.

--dar freeland

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The Hamster Wheel

"The Wheel" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

Guilt, shame, blame, repeat. Don't skip any steps.

What happens when the human hamster wheel we are running on while at our weakest level of consciousness becomes exposed? Our hidden self screams out with anger. Why would we choose something that provides volatility, rage and finally the systematic disintegration of all we've worked to build that is peaceful?...because that is what we do...

Why would we choose to be on this wheel to begin with? Most of the time, we don't know we are on it. But little untruths that emerge are our first clue. We feel we must hide something or be judged for it. Guilt is a huge waste of energy and resources within. But we are taught to feel it to our core, and the challenge to love self beyond another's opinion runs deep. When exposed, many feel anger about not having the strength or resources to remain hidden - so we strike out...and usually the what or who we love is standing too close to our volcano.

We feel guilt about something, then we feel shame, then we blame. Once the arrow of blame has been cast, we feel guilt about it. Then shame. Then we blame some more. We run so fast on the wheel that our egos become extraordinary athletes at it, or fall to the side in exhaustion. Then we feel some more guilt at what we are not. Some jump back on the wheel and push it into rotation again. Some jump OFF. Those are the lucky ones.

When we are always in the truth about ourselves, what we think, feel and do - even if it is unpleasant - we are finally FREE. We are human and imperfect...yet we never need to feel that we have to hide in order to survive or not be beaten down more - a potentially systemic condition. We CAN be imperfect because our imperfection is as impermanent as we are. It is a small moment in time. We know we can make adjustments and do it again until whatever it is - however we want to live and be, is in resonance with who we really know we are. We can say "I don't know" and be at peace with that until we find the solution.

We are already perfect - even and especially with those things we judge as imperfect. Not believing this (from years of conditioning) or trying to prove that we are someone different is what makes us jump on the wheel in the first place. The wheel goes nowhere. Only and always back to itself, until we are exhausted and fall, then we do it some more.

Jump.

--dar freeland

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The Path of the One Heart

"Conversations" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

Dramas, addictions, illusions, desires, stories - could perhaps be considered the product of a mind unfocused and without discipline.

A person does not need to have things be hard or dramatic - the goal is more to engage in a soft ease of living peacefully with excitement and pleasure. The cherry on top is being able to give to others with absolute abandon.

First, to clear the road, the baggage needs to be removed.

I found that giving up relationship with destructive emotions (other’s projections of shame and blame that I myself have bought into) … this toxicity could finally be released by the four step process I refer to as “Meta”:

1. Recognize (Identify what is the problem - what is it that does not feel like it fits or resonates with me?)

2. Acknowledge (See it is here and allow it to be exposed to self and others)

3. Accept (Embrace the truths discovered - understand its source and consequence-without trying to push it away)

4. Release (I stop grasping for it, buying into the addiction of it, feeling the illusion of its allure, let go)

Once we've taken the issue, and applied the above; the movie shown on the screen of relationship (another person’s actions and reactions) no longer needs to be present in life - and therefore does vanish. Once we see it, the projection has served its purpose and is no longer necessary.

One action that cannot be escaped - is to be accountable for my actions, take personal responsibility. Say I am sorry where it is appropriate. Make amends. This is particularly healing, and speeds the process. It is non-negotiable, because any attempt at healing that involves only blame, will repeat as an unrelenting reminder that the work is not complete and/or in full integrity.

We need to distinguish illusion, self-talk, rationalization, ego - all from what is truly living inside of self. Once we see it for real, we can let it go and open the heart fully. This new space now becomes a place to receive what we say we truly want, instead of a place to store the baggage.

How I choose to fill this void now, is up to me.

In this new moment, if one chooses, any relationship can stay intact. With note of the adjustments needed for healthy self care, and the pain having been addressed - the issues can now transform into empty space, providing the opportunity to fill that space with something more useful, such as love or peace.

--dar freeland

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The Bleating Egos

"One Two Punch" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

Anger and pain only last a moment, just drama that blurts forth in its self indulgent way. Comes then goes...and we can be the observer, or the catcher. It only stays if we grasp at it then hold on tight. When we make a fist, some stuff may get caught in there, then it is ours forever.

Unless we let go.

Blame and shame at our own emotions...the intolerance demonstrated against our own selves for being human, for losing our way, for being less than perfect - like throwing gas on a fire. True for ALL parties. It never is about anyone "out there" - other people are the screens onto which we project our movie. Can anyone other than anger's author even distinguish between "attack" and "accuracy" - and doesn't the receiver have his own movie playing simultaneously - governed by his own script? Are we so small that a bleating ego can crush a true and infinite love?

So what, now what?

"I'm sorry" is only the starting gun to the race - a sprint to the solution. If we can't hear the gun, we don't even know the race has begun. Perhaps we'd rather lose ourselves in the anesthesia of all that feels nothing, or what we think will feel "good" and will ultimately have us feel more shame...leaving us only to think, think, think.

Stuck on our hamster wheel of thought, our hearts wither and cry themselves to sleep.

I knew someone once. When my life was hurting, he asked permission, then tenderly kissed my eye. Ever since then, I've seen life differently. What magic his kiss.

I wish I had his power, I could just as tenderly kiss HIS eye - so he could see things differently.

--dar freeland

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"What The World Needs Now..."

"Expedition Chess" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

This morning I've considered many things regarding how we have been interacting with one another. I am speaking of humanity - the World community. America is polarized politically, families are arguing about money and behaviors, people are judging others relentlessly. This is also true among the people of the World collectively. Who is happy?

The Arts, which used to be a sanctuary or respite from so called "literal life"....it is becoming trampled with greed and invalidation - stolen for profit by those who do not create it, to advance their own purposes and shunned by those who would judge it as anything other than the mirror that it is. Art is a beautiful statement of our inside life, the one we don't allow anyone else to see. It is that recognition on whatever medium that gives art its immense value. We see ourselves in it.

One simple statement on that - Art is your MIRROR, world. It is a simple regurgitation of what its creator sees around him.

Art allows us to look in the mirror, and decide again. It allows us to think about life. It allows us to consider, recognize and make adjustments in our paths - because we are the CREATORS of our own lives. If we don't look at our lives, act on what we see, take part in our own evolution, we are just taking up space. Is that the life we want to live? I do not.

To those who would think that yelling is key - all yelling creates, is more yelling and a closing off of people to one another. Person to person, family to family, country to country and beyond. It does NOT provide any sort of SOLUTION. To become informed and educated is important, but not a solution unto itself. It allows one to yell with more articulation, yet the solution remains up to US to implement.

To those who would judge a musical artist like Sting (a prolific humanitarian) or any other artist/musician/creative who chooses to PRACTICE and DEMONSTRATE PEACE instead of going with the "norm" and engaging in an endless stream of bickering, political judgement and isolation - I say think again.

And guess what else...to judge a creative for "taking money" because of the payor's actions in life is ludicrous. If ANY business person assessed/judged and sentenced the actions of the buyer before selling to him - capitalism would cease to exist. A person has to sleep only with himself at night, and taking a stand is an individual right and responsibility - not up for discussion with world opinion. In other words, a personal choice and nobody's business.

All creatives are ENTITLED to make an income from their art. It is called WORK. He is NOT here solely for the world's entertainment. That went out with the Fool who performed for Kings.

Compassion and tolerance is the only key that will set us free from the polarization that is literally tearing the world apart. Assuming that the current trend of World "Scolding" and political name-calling rants on TV or any other place, is going to produce a USEFUL or TRANSFORMATIVE result...I say to all think again. Look in the mirror. What we see is our own ugliness looking back at us and we don't like it. Wake up everyone - we have the power to see things differently. No one else can see things from inside of our own heads...that is up to us.

Why are there so many prominent people leaving the planet? Why are planes falling out of the sky and wiping the entire "chessboard" clean? Why are there so many earthquakes right now? Powerful, jolting, destructive quakes? Is the earth asking, demanding that we wake up from our illusions? Is the movement of the earth its (metaphorical) art - showing us our own inner earthquakes, the devastation to our minds and souls? Is the earth demonstrating that in the face of our refusal to do so on our own, it will INSIST we unite - if not through our own evolution and wisdom, then through its powerful mandate? Let's face it - no matter the worst offenses of man...the earth herself will win.

Maybe if people used the Arts, used their power of discernment and thought...maybe if people stopped yelling and judging, pointing fingers, blaming and name calling - just maybe we could move beyond all of the apparent inconsolable unhappiness around us that we are all contributing to and in so doing - helping to create more of...a World Tantrum.

Maybe we could open a door - demonstrate and welcome some love, tolerance and peace into our own homes - one thought, one sentence, one person, one family member, one topic, one community, country and one world at a time. Jump with me off the anger wagon, choose again. There is absolutely nothing useful about acting or feeling this way. It is a useless waste of energy, effort, resources, choice and our own lives.

When was the last time we felt real, sincere, deeply rooted, immovable JOY? How about today?

--dar freeland

faceupstudio.com

Sunshine or Salt?

"Love Never Lost" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

When we are in the presence of someone hurting, do we see outside ourselves to their feelings, or do we interrupt our natural response of compassion? If a child were hurting, would we just shake our head and pass by, yelling "hey! suck it up!" or would we stop and with empathy, love the little one until it feels safe and out of pain? What do we do with the children of the mind? In an adult body, or a shorter young body - makes no matter the size. It is a child's pain in an older frame.

So, when faced with a wound - of our loved one, or our own - are we sunshine that heals, or salt that stings?

--dar freeland

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Human Detours

"Fear Days" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

Nothing feels more frustrating than to watch a loved one struggle needlessly with their own thoughts. A learning process perhaps - but habitual arguing, defeatist attitudes, self sabotage, literally standing on the freeway of one's own mind....how do we love them off the highway of self destruction? How do we ask; "please, don't allow yourself to be your own orange cone today..."

--dar freeland

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Stacks

"Early Messages" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

Since we are all contemplating our individual situations of "Love" - it felt useful to share something I learned recently. We've all heard "this too shall pass" - yet I've witnessed for years that imprints collected over a life of emotional wounding - don't "pass." They embed in our emotional memories and arise to ask for healing recognition and release on a regular basis. But do we notice them and respond? Do we honor the past once and for all with our validation or gloss over the feelings, pushing them farther down to emerge again as an "issue?"

Once we acknowledge the source of our pain or aggravation, then the energy of the wound holds no further purpose and will release. This is a concept I've attempted to convey for many years, in teaching how to honor one's feelings. We are not "crazy" or over reacting when we feel passionate about a thing...we are usually reacting to a "stack" of things that have the same energetic fingerprint - a sort of "straw that broke the camels' back." It isn't the one thing we are reacting to, it is the that one thing on top of a stack of history bearing the same imprint.

When something stacks up - our reactions aren't at that ONE thing, it backed by (the unconscious collected evidence) the STACK of things. So taking personal responsibility - and to give ourselves our own power back, we can look at the reaction of a thing and know we are not "crazy" - we can have compassion for self and others for carrying a stack of things, and know the reaction is leading us to our ultimate healing. Once we experience and honor the release of the past...the future can hold and/or express as nothing more than a benign response, or even better, a neutral event.

-- dar freeland

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