The Bleating Egos

"One Two Punch" by Dar Freeland

images & text © 1997-2011 Dar Freeland | all rights reserved

Anger and pain only last a moment, just drama that blurts forth in its self indulgent way. Comes then goes...and we can be the observer, or the catcher. It only stays if we grasp at it then hold on tight. When we make a fist, some stuff may get caught in there, then it is ours forever.

Unless we let go.

Blame and shame at our own emotions...the intolerance demonstrated against our own selves for being human, for losing our way, for being less than perfect - like throwing gas on a fire. True for ALL parties. It never is about anyone "out there" - other people are the screens onto which we project our movie. Can anyone other than anger's author even distinguish between "attack" and "accuracy" - and doesn't the receiver have his own movie playing simultaneously - governed by his own script? Are we so small that a bleating ego can crush a true and infinite love?

So what, now what?

"I'm sorry" is only the starting gun to the race - a sprint to the solution. If we can't hear the gun, we don't even know the race has begun. Perhaps we'd rather lose ourselves in the anesthesia of all that feels nothing, or what we think will feel "good" and will ultimately have us feel more shame...leaving us only to think, think, think.

Stuck on our hamster wheel of thought, our hearts wither and cry themselves to sleep.

I knew someone once. When my life was hurting, he asked permission, then tenderly kissed my eye. Ever since then, I've seen life differently. What magic his kiss.

I wish I had his power, I could just as tenderly kiss HIS eye - so he could see things differently.

--dar freeland

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